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I caught my bf masturbating to my masturbation video? I like to film myself masturbating sometimes when I'm alone but I don't show anybody my tapes not even my bf(it's to embarrassing) so I hide them in my closet in a box, well yesterday I came home early from work and I saw my boyfriend masturbating to them. I was really angry that he had found them, and even more angry that he was rummaging through my things. I yelled at him and he got angry and left the house do you think I overreacted? | | You should have taped him while at it. You could have masturbated to it in turn. A double turn on. | My roommate uploaded my masturbation video on youtube? after unloading my cream, i caught my roommate hiding under my desk, videotaping me..... i tried to catch him but he ran out of the room giggling with the recording.. then he sent me an email with a youtube link that directed you to the video of me doing it. there are already 80 views. i flagged the video and emailed the youtube technicians to delete the video but their not responding. help..... | | OWNED! | How much masturbation w/ watching porn occasionally is too much? Why does he feel embarrassed? We have a great sex life. At least once a day, sometimes two and three times a day, but why does he feel like he has to hide masturbation or gets embarrassed if I catch him like he is doing something wrong? He actually gets angry. The last time that I caught him. I got up in the morning and came down stairs to go to the bathroom and he was getting ready to, by watching a video of us on the computer. He acts like I busted him cheating. Why do guys feel this way? | | well when a guy masturbates he can have sex with whom ever he wants and in any manner he wants with no strings or inhibitions..its sort of like u interrupted his fantasy. if it was a video of you and him doing things well he was probably thinking about watching you and some other guy...most men have fantasies and most masturbate to them..masturbating is not something you just sit around and do for your wife or girl friend to watch. so i say its not that he don't mind what kind of sex life you and he has its just its his private time to have some kinky sex by him self with his imagination.....its not you. | Pornography and masturbation? 1. How does a parent confront a offspring (over 18) who has a huge collection of dirty magazines, videos, dvds hidden away in his room?
2. Does this mean he masturbates and will never be interested in getting a real girlfriend?
3. Should I seize the porn and burn it?
4. How normal is this in young people? | | If it is hidden in his room then he's being respectful enough of you not to leave it out in the open where you would easily find it. You might return this courtesy by not looking around for it and going through his things. You are invading his privacy as well as his trust. | Help!!!! My roommate uploaded my masturbation video on youtube? after unloading my cream, i caught my roommate hiding under my desk, videotaping me..... i tried to catch him but he ran out of the room giggling with the recording.. then he sent me an email with a youtube link that directed you to the video of me doing it. there are already 280 views. i flagged the video and emailed the youtube technicians to delete the video but their not responding. help..... WHAT SHOULD I DO?? | | Create a bunch of accounts and flag it from them so it will get removed faster | I said I forgive him, but how do I stop suspecting he is up to no good? A couple of months before our marriage, in a moment of lack of self control, my husband sent nude photos of himself to a random girl who sent him nude photos of herself to him. I had absolutely no idea any of this happened. I happily pranced to the altar, truly confident that my husband loved and cherished me and was not the sneaky, disrespectful type who would cheat on me.
I knew he had a habit of looking at porn. I knew he looked at porn while we were dating (we dated for several years). He did not look at porn because I wasn't putting out or because I wasn't attractive (my sex drive is larger than his, and I take care to keep looking good and staying fit and doing whatever he wants in the sack). BUT, his viewing of porn was not "healthy" or "normal" because it was severely impairing our sex life. He couldn't get relaxed without looking at porn first. He couldn't get aroused without looking at porn first. He couldn't get off period because the only thing that worked was porn, and his hand. Also, since porn took precedence over having sex with me, he would often expound all of his sexual energy and man stuff while watching porn and masturbating, thus not even trying to save anything for me (he told me that if he had previously masturbated during the day, then he would not be able to come later). So there I was, hot and horny as hell, and completely unable to pleasure him or interest him. And even if I somehow managed to get him in the mood, he could never come because he had already satisfied himself without me.
Since were heading in the direction of a serious relationship, and, not being one to avoid communication, I addressed the issue and told him he had to tone down the porn and masturbation thing. We had an honest and hopeful conversation that looked promising, because things began to improve as time went on. Instead of him masturbating to porn, he would watch porn (sometimes in secret, most often blatantly in front of me, or while I was sleeping) and then pounce on me instead of finishing it off himself.
This was an improvement, but I still resented myself because I simply could not turn him on the way porn did, and it was heartbreaking (even if I tried what those girls did). He said that he would stop looking at porn because he saw how it was destroying my self confidence and well being.
He toned it down. Our sex life improved. We were having consistently awesome lovemaking sessions. It was fantastic. I didn't mind that he occasionally looked at porn, especially when I was away (finishing up a degree for two semesters, but the visits were frequent). I almost, ALMOST thought that maybe porn wasn't so bad after all and that, like everything else, in moderation, it wasn't anything to feel threatened by.
Cut to: a few weeks after we are married. He has gone to work and I am sitting at home on the computer. I am feeling rather randy and decide to find watch one of his porn videos to get an idea to surprise him when he comes home from work. (His porn was not hidden - it was out in the open. I did not do any snooping). However, I find the nude photos of himself that he clearly exchanged with another, equally naked girl who sent him photos.
So when was he going to tell me? Never. He came home that evening and I confronted him about it. Among his many reactions, one of them was, "I was planning on deleting everything, but with the wedding planning and the wedding, I never got around to it." He never planned on telling me, ever. He said it was a horrible mistake which he will regret forever, but he had hoped to delete everything and make amends for his moment of weakness by being a good, honest husband. He said that he was working hard to fight his self-proclaimed "addiction" to porn and was trying to wean himself off of it. He promised me that he was bringing it down to almost nothing.
He cried. He sobbed. He begged for forgiveness. After many horrendously emotional moments and days spent blaming myself for falling short somehow and not being good enough, I said that I would forgive him. We both agreed that the trust thing will take some time. We both agreed that the porn must go for good because it is ruining what is otherwise a wonderful, loving and mature union of two people.
In the past year, I have caught him looking at porn twice. I have suspected he was up to something almost every day, but. I would think, "I don't want to be the paranoid wife!" and force myself to think of something else. Just when I would start to feel like, "Wow, this is what it is like to trust him again!" I would walk into the room with the computer and he would be looking at something.
I don't know how to not suspect him when I walk into a room and he quickly clicks out of whatever was looking at, or when he constantly deletes his browsing history, or when he is alone in the computer room, or when | Life is Simple (most of the time).
You already know he obviously has an addiction to porn.
Marry him and you will have to LIVE with his Addiction.
If you want that type of life (no trust and his addiction) go for it.
but i say â–ºRUN - Run like Heck!!!
best of luck to you,
SM | Third promise broken by husband about porno? My husband an i are just recently married about 1 month. when we were dating i knew that he looked at porno on his phone and on the computer with his uncles and it wasn't that big of a deal to me because i was still young living with my parents and so we couldn't have sex regularly.. i just told him i didn't like seeing it. well one day i was on his phone and found the history in his web and saw the pictures and it just disgusted me.. some sight called brutalblowjobs.com even though i had told him it was alright he saw how much it bothered me it was during that time that he also confided in me that about 3 months before we had started dating he had paid twenty dollars for a prostitute to give him a ******** for thirty mintues. he said that afterwards he felt bad for sinking so low to treat a woman like that and he never did it again.. it was then that i realized and told him that i thought he had a problem with sex and porno and so we agreed that he would not watch the porno anymore.. well then about a month later i accidently found websites again... this time it was videos on youtube. he couldnt actually watch them because he didn't have an account but it was just the fact that he had TRIED to after he promised me he wouldn't so then i realized that maybe he still needed masturbation since we were not haveing sex often so he agreed that when he needed to masutbate he would only use his imagination no porno. i did inform him though that i DID NOT like masturbation or him watching porno and that when we got married it would have to stop end of story... so everything was good.. we got married and then later he brought up the subject about porno again... so i decided that watching it together would be fine. that way he would not have to hide it from me... we bought a video and have watched it toghether everytime he has wanted to wich has not been very often.. i told him that watching them together was fine but i did not want him watching them alone... well then we got a computer and i set him up an account on it and i told him that it was his computer to he could do what he wanted but NO PORNO... so last night i come home from work and he was on the computer.. just looking up my name for fun... no big deal well then he calls me over and says... i don't know what happend it was an accident i need to get rid of this... he opens up windows media player.. and here pops up a video of a man and woman haveing sex.. so i deleted it and then went into his history and there were TONS of sights he had visited... (he is just learning the computer does not know how to delete things) when i asked him about it he said he was bored and only went to the sights out of curiosity to see if they would be blocked... he said he did not go in to look at them... but there were A TON over 12 and i said well one or two sights i could understand if you had just looked to see if it was blocked and then left but 12, 13, 14, 15 DIFFERENT sights?? i dont' think so .. when your bored you need to find something better to do with your time... he promised me NO PORNO period that includes TRYING to look at them.. or jsut LOOKING for the sights... this time he just said Oh sorry... that was all i didn't feel that he was very sincere .. in the past he cried because he felt so bad about deciving me. i was bawling my eyes out and he just kept saying.. a lame sorry... i wasnt' meaning to look just curious... i'm so confused and hurt this is the THIRD time and ive tried bringing it into our relationship togehter but he still enjoys it alone?? why?? it makes me feel insecure as well because i am dealing with a weight problem... i know he loves me but why??? please help me... i think he really has a problem but i don't know how to stop it. | | It's a real addiction. He has a problem and needs help. He probably really wants to stop and be far away from it but he has a problem. Be sympathic and don't down him. Offer to be with him and get some help. Tell him, "I love you so much and love all the fun we have together but do you really expect me to be okay with this for the rest of our marriage. I want to be with you and you with me but we have to work throught this issue and I want to do it together. I am here for you." I am sure he feels bad and if he doesn't and refuses help well, it won't work and you will be very unhappy. | Should i trust my boyfriend? ok, this is going to be a long description. my boyfriend and i have been together nearly two years, the other day he told me i could use his computer to activate my new phone, so when he went upstairs to shower i got on his computer and there was porn downloads all over the screen. (yes i know porn is normal for guys continue reading) they were physically downloaded and saved on his computer. our whole relationship he has told me that he doesn't really like porn b/c he can't get off by masturbation so it's pointless. (so he can't masturbate) i had a bad gut feeling when i saw all this, so i checked through his pics and videos. he only had one pic of himself and he was shirtless and he had folders and folders of porn videos. i went and confronted him about it and he said he was making a dvd for a friend at work and kinda became mad at me and said "what you wanna check my phone too" ? of course i said no and felt guilty but still something didn't feel right. so i googled his name he frequently uses and surprise surprise, he's on two different porn sites as a subscriber and there are some of the videos i found on his computer on one of the sites. there's redhead porn and porn with big boobs and porn that looks similar to his ex (but isn't), on his page...he told me he hates redheads, i have tiny boobs, and his ex is hideous. so i feel like i'm uncovering little lie after lie. i googled his sn and his exes name and find an encoded link to a video. this i text him about and he says there is no video that he never made one...so i play along and thank him for being honest which must've sparked a nerve b/c then he admitted he made one with her but that it's long gone. i just have this bad gut feeling and it all started when i found that porn...and then he lied about it right to my face. i'm just wondering what else he's hiding at this point...what's everyone else's take on this | OK, yes people watch porn, hell I am female and I watch it (even alone). So obviously I do not have any bad feelings about it or people who watch it. However, when someone that you are in a committed relationship is lying to you about ANYTHING that is NOT good! Knowing his age would help because sometimes younger guys have trouble even admitting they masturbate at all.
Not that I think you should play games or anything but you could try to act as if you are into porn as well and see how he reacts. Say you have been afraid to tell him because he always said he didn't like it. Just a thought! Good luck hun. | How do I get my Fiancee to quit lying and watching porn? This is my second post. He won't quit and I need help. I am pregnant with his guy and feel like if this doesn't stop I will HAVE to leave him. I get that porn is "just something guys do" but I wont take that as an answer anymore because that's a lie. Not all guys do it and I want to either get him to quit or I will find someone who doesn't watch porn or if I can't then I want to at least find someone who won't lie to me about it or hide it. More than a porn addiction and a lying addiction I think he has a MAJOR masturbation addiction...even sex doesn't stop him (and I'm great at it!!). He even goes as far as to beating it to music videos. I feel it is so degrading to me...all his lies are the worst. He has stopped for the most part, but not about this. Sometimes I can't prove he's lying but I just know he is because I feel it in my gut. Any way I can get him to stop 1. watching porn and 2. lying about it or hiding it? Any tips? We've been together for over 3 years and this has got to stop NOW before I bring our baby into this world. I need advice FAST!! Thanks :) | | please chill out. If this is the only problem you have with him, thank God. He is a man and you are not going to get him to stop looking at porn all together. Why do you care? He's home with you right? Get down off the cross and stop hounding the man. If you did not nag about it he would not have to lie about it? You wanted to marry a man right, well you did and that is how they are. Time to wake up and smell the roses before you and that baby find yourselve alone. | Porn= no trust? Help? Porn has been an issue in our marriage and he has repeatedly promised me that he would stop. He knows and acknowledges that it deeply hurts me, to the point I've asked for a divorce before. Now it's not even about the women that hurts me anymore, but the LIES! I'm tired of the broken promises. I'm tired of him sneaking and hiding. Whether it be a magazine, a "adult-friend-finder" account, or just videos of women doing stripteases. Again and again he promises me he will stop, and he will- for a while. But it never fails that I find it yet again. The tears come, the anger, the betrayal. This last time I found a magazine left out that my 3 year old son found before I did.
And the kicker? He claims he just watches it. He says he doesn't get sexual gratification from it, but just enjoys watching it. No masturbation even... just watches it. WHAT?!?! He says it has nothing to do with me and that he still finds me amazingly sexually attractive, even more attractive than when we got married. He even tells me he doesn't find a lot of the women he watches very attractive. So WHY is he watching it?!?!? Why is he hurting me so much?!?!?
I'm hurt, I'm crying, I feel worthless and betrayed. He has destroyed all of my trust in him and I don't know where to go. I'm on the verge of divorce if he can't quit lying to me!
How can I make him understand that I can't keep doing this? | | Maybe you should focus on yourself. Why are you so bothered by what he does? You should work on your self-esteem. No one should be able to make you feel unhappy. |
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